Pineapple Express
In "Pineapple Express," Seth Rogen plays a process server who witnesses a murder while on duty. At the scene of the crime, he drops a joint made with a super-rare form of marijuana that he got from his dealer, played by James Franco. When the killer uses that pot to track them down, Rogen and Franco must go on the lam. And this, folks, is why you should just say no to drugs! The central joke in "Pineapple Express" is that these two guys really aren't completely functional during this dangerous situation because they're both stoned out of their minds. I think we can all agree that if a crazed killer is chasing you, sobriety helps big time. "Pineapple Express" was directed by David Gordon Green, a guy who usually makes very artsy little films. In his hands, the movie gives off a cool indie vibe, even though it's a summer blockbuster with an A-list cast. Green also focuses on character development, even in the midst of all the humor and action. Seth Rogen and James Franco are really funny in the lead roles; Cheech and Chong may want to watch their back because there's a new pothead duo in town. Some folks might take issue with a movie that mines drug abuse for laughs, but this film neither glorifies nor condemns the wacky tobacky. It simply tells a highly entertaining story about two dudes who just happen to light up every chance they get. Personally, I've never tried pot in my life, but I have to say that "Pineapple Express" gave me a distinct high. (3 1/2 stars)

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor
About an hour after seeing "The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor," I sat down to write my review and found that I couldn't actually remember the name of the movie. I remembered the "Mummy" part, but couldn't recall the subtitle. That kind of tells you just how un-memorable the sequel is. Brendan Fraser is back for a third go-round and Maria Bello replaces Rachel Weisz, who has an Oscar now and presumably couldn't be bothered with all this mummy nonsense. Jet Li plays the new mummy, an ancient Chinese emperor who rises from the grave with plans to resurrect his undead army and take over the world. Apparently being wrapped in bandages for hundreds of years is enough to make a guy good and angry. "The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor" is the worst kind of sequel - the kind that reeks of having been made purely for the paycheck. There are no new ideas here. It's merely a retread of the first two Mummy pictures with a dash of dull martial arts action thrown in. The acting is non-existent, the special effects are unimpressive, and the plot is so dull that it's almost like the movie is daring you to stay awake. The only good thing here is a scene that involves a group of abominable snowmen. I think you'll agree that there's no movie that isn't improved at least a little bit by the appearance of yeti. But that's six minutes out of a two hour movie. As far as I'm concerned, it's time to seal this Mummy back up into its crypt and keep it there. (1 1/2 stars)

Swing Vote
In "Swing Vote," the Presidential election has come down a tie. Kevin Costner plays an unemployed alcoholic in a small New Mexico town whose young daughter tried to vote on his behalf. Who did she vote for - Miley Cyrus? When the vote isn't counted, Costner is permitted by law to recast it. In other words, the race to see who will become the most powerful person in the free world is in the hands of one guy. Actually, I guess that would make HIM the most powerful person in the free world, wouldn't it? Kelsey Grammer and Dennis Hopper play the candidates, who try to woo Costner, no matter what it takes. "Swing Vote" starts off a little clunky, but once its admittedly far-fetched premise is established, it turns into a surprisingly funny and astute satire of our two-party political system. I thought it was hilarious to watch the candidates all-too-willingly sell out their beliefs just to win a vote. The picture also has something important to say about the need for the American public to do away with apathy and start becoming informed about our potential elected officials. The performances are good all the way around, especially the one from Madeline Carroll as Costner's conscientious daughter. "Swing Vote" doesn't tell you anything you don't already know, but it's got a finger on the pulse of something, which makes it a better-than-expected piece of entertainment. And there's not a "hanging chad" in sight. (3 stars)

Step Brothers
"Step Brothers" stars Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly as two grown men with a lot in common. Both are immature, unemployed, and single, and both still live at home. It's kind of pathetic, especially when you realize that even the 40 Year-Old Virgin had a job and his own place. When their parents get married, Ferrell and Reilly are forced to share a bedroom. Their sibling rivalry eventually comes to a head and their fed-up parental units insist that they find work and alternate living arrangements. "Step Brothers" has an amusing concept, and the promise of seeing the two stars reunited after "Talladega Nights" is exciting. There are some incredibly hilarious moments in the movie, especially in the early scenes. Unfortunately, the good times don't last. Having Ferrell and Reilly both play overgrown man-children ultimately becomes repetitive. And I'm saying this as someone who has devoted his own life to being an overgrown man-child. I also felt worn out by the film's incessant raunchy humor. I generally like this sort of thing, but in "Step Brothers" it's just gratuitous. A good raunchy comedy - like "Superbad" - knows how to weave the dirty stuff into the structure of the story. This one just throws it out there because it can. I liked "Step Brothers" at first, but by the laugh-free final third, I was identifying more with the annoyed parents than with the fun-loving children. (2 1/2 stars)

Mamma Mia!
There's much to love about ABBA. Their songs were catchy, they were snappy dressers, and their name spelled the same thing forward and backward. How cool is that? Apparently the creators of the musical "Mamma Mia!" loved ABBA too, because the group's songs were used exclusively in the stage show. For the movie version, Amanda Seyfried plays a young girl living on a scenic Greek island who is trying to find out which of three men is her father. Meryl Streep plays her mother, and considering that she apparently slept with three different guys at roughly the same time, I'd say she's a bit of a slut. Pierce Brosnan, Colin Firth, and Stellan Skarsgard play the potential poppas. All kinds of complications ensue, but thankfully there are lots of ABBA songs to sing. "Mamma Mia!" is a strange movie. Honestly, I don't think it's very good, and yet I enjoyed myself anyway. Most of the actors are terrible singers, especially Pierce Brosnan, whose warbling would certainly make packs of wild dogs howl. They dance only slightly better. (No Dancing Queens here!) The film's musical numbers also lack the pizzazz and polish of movies like "Hairspray" and "Dreamgirls." Having said all that, "Mamma Mia!" works because the songs are irresistible and the actors provide a lot of infectious energy. At some level, I think the director didn't want the cast to be too polished; it gives the picture a feeling that these are ordinary people who just happen to spontaneously burst into a chorus of "Waterloo" from time to time. "Mamma Mia!" is a crazy, sloppy, mixed-up movie that doesn't take itself too seriously, and I have to admit that I had fun watching it. (3 stars)

he X-Files: I Want to Believe
I might not be the appropriate person to review "The X-Files: I Want to Believe." I only ever saw the TV show a small handful of times. And the weird thing is that I thought this movie was really good, whereas my best friend - who was a hardcore "X-Files" fanatic - thought it was about as exciting as getting an anal probe from E.T. David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson return as agents Mulder and Scully. This time they are investigating a series of murders where severed body parts of the victims keep popping up in the snow. (Apparently yellow snow is no longer the biggest thing you have to worry about in winter.) Billy Connelly plays a pedophile former-priest who claims to have visions from God about the killings. My buddy's beef with "The X-Files: I Want to Believe" is that it was a stand-alone movie that didn't continue to explore the show's mythology. From my point of view, that was a good thing because I wouldn't have known what the heck was going on if it had. The theme being explored here is faith - how we gain it, how we lose it, and we get it back. Although the story goes to some appropriately freaky places toward the end, it uses all the paranormal stuff to tell a surprisingly thoughtful story about the basic human need to believe in something in life. I have no clue what "X-Files" fans will think of this movie, but I found it to be both poignant and creepy. And that's the truth - which, according to the show, is out there. (3 stars)

Journey to the Center of the Earth
In "Journey to the Center of the Earth," Brendan Fraser plays a volcano expert who discovers a secret tunnel to the planet's core. He investigates with the help of his adolescent nephew (Josh Hutcherson) and a foxy blonde Icelandic tour guide (Anita Briem). (I've taken tours before, and I only ever seem to get stuck with wrinkly old guys. What's up with that?) What they find is amazing - a "world within a world" complete with carnivorous plants, flesh-eating fish, and even dinosaurs. Getting down there is the easy part; getting back to the surface proves to be a lot more difficult and a lot more dangerous. "Journey to the Center of the Earth" starts off slow but eventually gathers some momentum after our heroes actually begin their descent. Each new adventure is a little more exciting than the last. Nothing here is earth-shattering (no pun intended) or brilliant; it's just supposed to be a fun ride, which it is. It's worth noting that most theaters are showing the movie in 2-D, but select theaters have it in digital 3-D. I drove to Harrisburg to see it in 3-D, and this is definitely the preferred format. The 3-D effects add immeasurably to the entertainment value. The flick would probably be okay in regular old 2-D, although with all three dimensions going, it's a really spectacular moviegoing experience. (3 stars)

The Dark Knight
I could sum up my feelings about "The Dark Knight" in just four words: Best Superhero Movie Ever. But since I still have a lot of space to fill here, I guess I'll go into more detail. Christian Bale returns as Batman, and this time he's taking on Heath Ledger's Joker, who is trying to spread evil throughout Gotham. One of the Joker's main plans is to destroy the city's morale by corrupting its beloved district attorney, Harvey Dent (played by Aaron Eckhart). Smart guy - he knows that if you want to unleash real evil, you go straight to the politicians! In order to defeat someone as truly vile as the Joker, Batman has to decide whether or not to cross his own ethical boundaries. Hey, Batman can take a lot; he even managed to survive being played by George Clooney. A good superhero movie gives you plenty of bang for your buck, and "The Dark Knight" has some amazing action scenes and super-cool new bat-gizmos, including a high-tech motorcycle. But what makes this a GREAT superhero movie is that it goes way beyond its comic book origins. "The Dark Knight" tells an incredibly deep story that explores the very nature of heroism and villainy. Christian Bale is once again sensational as Batman, and Heath Ledger is so wonderfully menacing as the Joker that Jack Nicholson must be having an inferiority complex right about now. "The Dark Knight" is the rare movie that not only lives up to all the hype, but also surpasses it. Like I said: Best Superhero Movie Ever. (4 stars)

Space Chimps
If a bunch of monkeys got together and remade "The Right Stuff," it might end up looking something like "Space Chimps." This is the story of Ham (voiced by Andy Samberg), a circus monkey who is recruited by NASA for an important space mission. What - Tom Hanks wasn't available? Along with two other chimps, Ham is sent into the cosmos to retrieve a wayward satellite that has crash-landed on an alien planet. One of that planet's inhabitants has reprogrammed the gizmo and become something of an interstellar dictator. It's up to Ham and crew to get the thing back and return it safely to Earth. Despite having a genial nature and a few honest chuckles, "Space Chimps" is definitely on the low end of the evolutionary scale when it comes to animated movies. The CGI work here never goes beyond the level of something you'd see in a Nintendo Wii game. Then there's the plot, which meanders all over the place. You can tell that the filmmakers wanted to tell a story about monkeys in space but they never figured out exactly what that story should be. Therefore, the movie haphazardly throws a lot of things into the mix that don't go together. This is by no means the worst movie I've ever seen, but here's my bottom line: Given that we have a gorgeously-animated, beautifully-constructed interstellar fantasy like "Wall-E" currently in theaters, why would anybody waste their time on "Space Chimps?" (2 stars)

Hellboy II: The Golden Army
"Hellboy II: The Golden Army" follows the further adventures of the demon superhero,
played by Ron Perlman. Also returning are his girlfriend, who has the power to
spontaneously combust, and his sidekick, a half-man, half-fish. They have to be careful
to keep the girlfriend away from the fish guy or else she might accidentally cook him.
This time, Hellboy is trying to stop a power-hungry underworld prince who wants to
re-ignite a centuries-old war between his people and the human race. To this, he first
needs to awaken the long-dormant Golden Army, a massive militia of indestructible
machines. It's up to Hellboy, fire-girl, and Mr. Filet-o-fish to prevent him from getting
the magical artifact he needs to accomplish this. I'm a fan of the Hellboy comic books,
and for that reason, I really liked the first movie. But "Hellboy II: The Golden Army" is
even better. Everything is ramped up for this sequel. It's got more action, more humor,
more character development, and more incredible special effects. Director Guillermo
del Toro - who also made the acclaimed "Pan's Labyrinth" - knows how to tell an
effective story and how to create an imaginative fantasy world that we can get completely absorbed in. So if it's fun and excitement you crave, go to "Hellboy 2." (3 1/2 stars)

Hancock
When I first heard that Will Smith was starring in a movie called "Hancock," I thought: Will Smith as the guy who signed the Declaration of Independence? In truth, the Hancock he plays in this movie is actually the world's worst superhero. Well, okay, Aquaman is the world's worst superhero, but this guy is a close second. He's constantly drunk, he does more harm than good, and he has a tendency to grope women on the street. Hancock saves the life of public relations expert Jason Bateman, who offers to pay him back by helping to rehabilitate his image. This doesn't sit well with Bateman's wife, played by Charlize Theron, for reasons that don't become clear until the movie's second half. "Hancock" has a really clever premise, and there are some very funny scenes showing the superhero flying while intoxicated and damaging Los Angeles landmarks while attempting to fight crime. Let me tell you something: you'd never see Iron Man pulling that crap! Will Smith gives another terrific performance here, allowing himself to play a character who is not always sympathetic. I really liked how the story shows Hancock slowly cleaning up his act and redeeming himself. Bateman and Theron are also quite good, and the film has some cool action sequences. I think some of the movie's ideas could have been developed a little more fully, especially since the plot twist that drives the third act feels like it comes out of nowhere. While not a perfect film, "Hancock" does at least deliver enough laughs and thrills to provide a good time. (3 stars)

Kit Kittredge: An American Girl
I don't know very much about the novels or dolls on which "Kit Kittredge: An American Girl" is based, and I'm certainly not in the target audience for this thing, but I do know that a good movie is a good movie no matter what. And this is a very good movie. Abigail Breslin plays the title character, a young girl/aspiring reporter living in Cincinnati during the Great Depression. When her family takes a financial hit, her father (Chris O'Donnell) heads to Chicago in search of work, leaving her alone with her mother (Julia Ormond) and the eccentric borders they take in to earn some much-needed cash. "Kit Kittridge" is surprisingly frank in its depiction of the Great Depression. It shows the things families had to do to survive, such as wearing dresses made from potato sacks, or selling eggs. It also shows the prejudices that down-and-out people faced. Over the course of the story, Breslin (who gives an excellent performance) learns that poor people aren't necessarily bad; they are human beings who, through one form of calamity or another, have hit hard times. When I have children, this is the kind of movie I hope they will like. It's intelligent, it's meaningful, and it doesn't condescend to kids. In fact, it actually encourages kids to think about their own prejudices, as well as the relative affluence so many of us take for granted. Walking into the theater, I never expected to say this but…I loved this film. (3 1/2 stars)

Wall-E
In the new movie "Wall-E," the Earth has become so riddled with garbage that it's no longer habitable. Kind of like parts of New Jersey. The planet's last remaining life form is a rusty old robot named Wall-E, who spends his days collecting trash so that humans might one day be able to return. When a sleek, sophisticated, female robot comes to Earth looking for vegetation, it's love at first sight. But when she goes back home, Wall-E hitches a ride, travels through space, and accidentally ends up liberating the human species. Wow, that's a lot of work for something that's basically a glorified garbage can. "Wall-E" is the ninth film from Pixar Animation Studios, and it's also their ninth home run. The animation in this movie is astounding, from the abandoned, trash-filled Earth to the ultra-modern space city the robot eventually finds himself in. The film has a very memorable lead character, and let's be honest - your kids are going to want to buy anything his picture is on. So be prepared to shell out some bucks for everything from Wall-E toys to Wall-E spatulas. Kids will love the cute robots and the wacky humor, but adults will appreciate the surprisingly deep meaning in a story that deals with loneliness and isolation, hope and disappointment, environmental hazards, and sweet robot love. In short, "Wall-E" is a masterpiece. (4 stars)

Wanted
"Wanted" is the story of a mild-mannered cubicle dweller (James McAvoy) who is inducted into a secret society of assassins. (As opposed to the public societies of assassins, which are easily located in the Yellow Pages.) Morgan Freeman plays the group's leader, and Angelina Jolie is the sultry shooter who seduces McAvoy into joining. These killers, who get their orders from a mysterious ancient source, have a variety of special powers, including the ability to shoot their guns a certain way so that the bullets curve to hit a target. That's so handy for those occasions when you need to shoot someone who's standing around the corner. Through his participation in the program, McAvoy learns some surprising secrets about his new colleagues, as well as himself. "Wanted" is an intentionally over-the-top action movie. People fly through the air, cars somersault over busses, and bullets smash into each other after being fired from guns. The filmmakers really go out of their way to show you things you've never seen before, and the result is a movie that makes you feel like you've just injected a case of Red Bull directly into your bloodstream. "Wanted" also has some surprisingly strong performances and a wicked sense of humor. There' no substance here at all - just two hours of unrepentantly violent and nihilistic fun. (3 1/2 stars)

Get Smart
Come out from your cone of silence, put on your shoe phone, and head on down to the movies, because the classic TV show "Get Smart" is now on the big screen. Steve Carell plays CONTROL agent Maxwell Smart, who goes on an undercover mission to prevent the evil KAOS organization from launching another bid for worldwide domination. Helping him out is the lovely Agent 99, played by Anne Hathaway. And when she's not busy fighting KAOS, I can only assume that she's taking on Italian businessmen who create fraudulent charities and pretend to be associated with the Vatican to perpetrate real estate schemes. The mission takes them from Washington, D.C. to Moscow, to Los Angeles, but I think they should have gone to Kansas City and messed up a football game, because then the bumbling Smart could have said, "Sorry about that, Chiefs." "Get Smart" is one of the most enjoyable movies I've seen all year, thanks to the absolutely perfect casting of Steve Carell, who is a worthy successor to the original Smart, Don Adams. Carell is hilarious, providing one big laugh after another and sharing a solid chemistry with Anne Hathaway. It's not shock that the film works as a comedy, but what is surprising is that it kind of works as an action picture too. Even if you've never seen the show on which it's based, "Get Smart" is a fantastic mixture of comedy and action that will entertain you silly. (3 1/2 stars)

The Love Guru
In "The Love Guru," Mike Myers portrays Pitka, a spiritual healer and author of many self-help books. He is hired by Jessica Alba, who plays the owner of a professional hockey team. (What team is that - the Toronto Hot Chicks?) Her star player has been in a slump ever since his wife left him for a goalie (Justin Timberlake), and she wants Pitka to help him get his mojo back so that he can get the puck outta here. In the "Wayne's World" and "Austin Powers" movies, Mike Myers proved that he is a brilliant comedian. However, "The Love Guru" proves that he's just as fallible as anyone else. In addition to repeating jokes, the movie has the most inane and ceaseless assemblage of jokes about the male organ ever committed to celluloid. Seriously, this 90-minute movie has at least 100 such jokes. Don't get me wrong - I love lowbrow humor as much as the next guy, but did Myers write this script when he was eleven years old, or what? After a while, the gags become oppressive, especially since none of them are funny. Neither is Pitka, who remains an unimpressive character. It occurs to me that the last time Mike Myers appeared live on screen was in 2003's equally dismal The Cat in the Hat. If there is any consolation to be found in The Love Guru, it is this: after such a deplorable one-two punch, Myers will certainly hasten to work on a fourth Austin Powers film. Groovy, baby, yeah. (1 star)

The Incredible Hulk
When I was a kid, all the neighborhood children used to play kickball in the street. Whenever a car would come and interrupt the game, we'd all yell "do-over!." Well "The Incredible Hulk" is kind of a do-over too. After the first Hulk outing proved to be a commercial disappointment, the studio decided to make a more fan-friendly version. Edward Norton takes over the role of scientist Bruce Banner, who was zapped by too many gamma rays and now turns muscular and green whenever he gets angry. And when I say "green," I don't mean he's eco-friendly, I mean he's the color green! While trying to solve his metamorphosis problem, the Hulk has to take on a special ops agent, played by Tim Roth, who has been brought in to hunt him down. However, the guy absorbs some gamma rays of his own and turns into the creature known as Abomination. I actually kind of liked the first "Hulk" picture, but I'll admit that this one is more in line with other comic book movies. There's a lot more action and excitement, and fewer scenes of Bruce Banner dealing with his daddy issues. Best of all, there's still a coherent human story in the middle of all the Hulk smashing, bashing, and crashing. "The Incredible Hulk" doesn't quite reach the level of "Iron Man" or the Spider-Man flicks, but it's a fun superhero movie that definitely delivers the goods we want it to. (3 stars)

The Happening
"The Happening" is the first R-rated movie ever from writer/director M. Night Shyamalan. Why is this important? Because the guy wants to do everything possible to set this film apart from his last two, "The Village" and "Lady in the Water," which were complete duds! In this darker story, Mark Wahlberg plays a Philly school teacher who flees with his wife (Zooey Deschanel) and best friend's daughter when a mysterious plague starts sweeping the Northeast. The plague seems to be carried on the wind, and it causes its victims to become disoriented and suicidal. (The same thing happens if you watch too many consecutive episodes of "The Hills.") Wahlberg and company try to outrun the plague by heading to the remote countryside, but it appears as though disaster is imminent. "The Happening" is destined to be one of the most divisive movies of the year. The premise is so unusual that some people will really like it, while others will absolutely abhor it with a passion. Fights could possibly break out in theater lobbies! I fall into the category of people who like it. While by no means perfect, this is an ambitious story that's about more than just trying to creep you out. "The Happening" is ultimately about what people do for their loved ones in a time of unavoidable crisis. The performances are good and Shyamalan delivers a number of scenes that send a chill down your spine. Yes, at times "The Happening" is a little silly, but if you are open to what it's trying to say, then this is a movie you can really get into. (3 stars)

Kung Fu Panda
In "Kung Fu Panda," Jack Black provides the voice of Po the Panda, who works at his father's noodle bar but dreams of becoming a martial arts master. And how exactly does a panda learn martial arts? Ancient Chinese secret! Po gets his wish when he's inexplicably prophesied to be the warrior who will defeat a ruthless snow leopard that is threatening the otherwise peaceful village. He gets some training from a local sensei (played by Dustin Hoffman) and he also joins a team of king fu animal defenders. Angelina Jolie is a tiger, Lucy Liu is a snake, Jackie Chan is a monkey, David Cross is a crane, and Seth Rogen is a mantis. He may be a mantis, but he's a Superbad mantis! "Kung Fu Panda"works on several different levels. It works as a kids' movie because it has a strong message about finding your own special skills to succeed in life. It works as a comedy because the plot and voice acting are very funny. And it works as a martial arts movie because the fighting scenes are surprisingly exciting given that they're animated. The film also has a lot of fun spoofing the whole genre of martial arts pictures. But thankfully, the voices still move in sync with the characters' lips. Factor all these things in and then add some spectacular visuals and you end up with a top-tier animated movie. (4 stars)

You Don't Mess With the Zohan
In "You Don't Mess With the Zohan," Adam Sandler plays an Israeli counter-terrorist who gives up the lifestyle so he can move to New York City and become a professional hairdresser. I have just one question: Who thinks this stuff up? Sandler gets a job at a small beauty salon where he cuts the hair of elderly female clients and then, as a bonus, sexually pleasures them in the back room. Again: Who thinks this stuff up? When his longtime Palestinian nemesis (John Turturro) finds out that Sandler is alive, well, and moussed up in the Big Apple, he plots to kill the happy hairdresser once and for all. I'll give Adam Sandler some credit. "You Don't Mess With the Zohan" is one of his more ambitious films, and he works hard to create a fully-realized character. It could have worked, except that the movie never figures out what it wants to be. Half of it is a typically silly, lowbrow Adam Sandler comedy; the other half is a high-minded political satire of the ongoing conflict between the Israelis and the Palestinians. Both halves provide their share of laughs, but they go together about as successfully as…well, Israelis and Palestinians. People looking for a mindless comedy will be turned off by all the political stuff, while fans of edgy topical humor will be distracted by all the sex/bodily fluid jokes. Although I did laugh at times, I ultimately found the movie to be too disjointed to recommend. Hey, did I just mess with the Zohan? Indeed I did. (2 1/2 stars)

Sex and the City
"Sex and the City" is the movie version of the most popular HBO series that didn't feature an overweight mafia boss from New Jersey. Kim Cattrall, Cynthia Nixon, and Kristen Davis all reprise their roles, and they rally around Sarah Jessica Parker's Carrie Bradshaw after she's left at the altar by long-time boyfriend Mr. Big. Sounds to me like Mr. Big needs to change his name to Mr. Big Stupid Jerk! Jennifer Hudson also stars as Carrie's new personal assistant, who helps her organize her now Big-free life. A lot more happens in the movie than I have time to explain here, but as you might be able to guess, most of it involves characters having sex, not having sex, or having sex and wishing they weren't. Hey, it ain't called "Holding Hands and the City," right? Just like on the show, there are lots of raunchy laughs, but what I like most about the film is its depiction of female friendship. The actresses create strong characters who share a genuine bond through thick and thin. If the humor works, it's only because we care about Carrie and her crew. My main complaint is that, at two-and-a-half hours, the film is way too long. I mean, it's literally five times the length of an episode of the show. Hardcore fans will take that as a plus, but newcomers or casual watchers like myself may suffer from "numb posterior" syndrome. That aside, "Sex and the City" is a smart, funny, well-acted movie that always plays like a labor of love and never like a cash-in. (3 stars)

The Strangers
In "The Strangers," Liv Tyler and Scott Speedman play a couple staying overnight at his parents' summer home after a friend's wedding. Their evening is shattered when three masked weirdos begin pounding on the door and trying to get inside. (Man, those Girl Scouts are getting really aggressive at cookie-selling time, aren't they?) Tyler and Speedman try to stay alive as it becomes apparent that their stalkers are out for blood. "The Strangers" had one of the most frightening coming attractions trailers I've ever seen. But while it's scary in that 2-minute format, the actual 85-minute movie is anything but. The characters do a lot of typically stupid horror movie things. For example, in one scene, Tyler hides from one of the psychos in the kitchen pantry. Good idea - no escape from a place like that! Also, while the early scenes have an admittedly admirable sense of dread building up, the finale turns suddenly and sickeningly cruel, for no good reason. The story claims that it wants to be about random acts of violence, yet it has nothing to say about the subject. The final shot of the film is also a complete cop-out guaranteed to make you want to hurl Jujubees at the screen. The two main actors give competent performances, and there are a few stray moments that create some mild suspense. However, the fact remains that "The Strangers" is not nearly as scary as it looks in the advertising. (2 stars)

The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian
"The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian" is the second movie to be based on a beloved series of books by C.S. Lewis. And if Lewis were alive to see this adaptation of his work, I'm pretty sure he'd be looking for someone to slap silly. The story follows the Pensevie children, who return to the mystical land of Narnia to help the deposed Prince Caspian claim the throne that is rightfully his. But first, they have to find the talking lion Aslan (voiced by Liam Neeson) and then defeat Caspian's power-hungry uncle who wants the throne for himself. I wasn't the biggest fan of the first "Narnia," but I'll admit it had a sense of wonder as the children discovered a magical new world. However, in this sequel, their individual personalities are gone and they become generic action heroes, participating in endless battle scenes that play like a pint-sized version of "300" - minus the entertainment value. Those action scenes never generate any excitement because the director fails to bring any filmmaking style to them. Additionally, the movie has a dull villain, lots of really clunky dialogue, and some bad, bad acting. "Prince Caspian" was clearly designed to be an epic blockbuster, but in trying to be the Next Big Thing, they've sucked all the life out of this story. (1 star)

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
I'm a hardcore Indiana Jones fan, and I've been waiting 19 years for another adventure from the cinema's greatest archaeologist. That being the case, it pains me to say that "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull"...is only two hours long. I could have watched this awesome movie all day! Harrison Ford returns as Indy, and this time he's in search of - you guessed it - a magical crystal skull that may have ties to a lost city of gold, as well as the infamous Area 51 in Roswell, New Mexico. Helping him locate the skull is his new teenage sidekick, played by Shia LeBeouf. Indy has a new sidekick? Short Round is gonna be so ticked! Cate Blanchett also stars as a Russian paranormal expert who wants the skull to further a scary Communist agenda. "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull" has all the edge-of-your-seat, thrill-a-minute action that you'd expect in an Indy movie. There's an amazing jeep chase through the jungle, a journey through some death-defying catacombs, and a scene involving ants that will make your skin crawl. The film also has moments of great humor, including some hilarious references to the other three installments. Now, this is not a perfect movie. The plot is a little over-complicated at times, and the crystal skull is perhaps not quite as interesting as the Lost Ark of the Covenant or the Holy Grail. But on the whole, "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull" is a solid, thrill-packed, immensely entertaining chapter in one of the most enjoyable series in movie history. (3 1/2 stars)

What Happens in Vegas
In "What Happens in Vegas," Cameron Diaz and Ashton Kutcher play strangers who meet in Sin City, get massively drunk, and spontaneously marry. What - no Siegfried and Roy show? Who goes to Vegas and doesn't make time to see Siegfried and Roy? Their plans for an annulment are complicated when he puts her quarter in a slot machine and wins $3 million. Both lay claim to the money, so a judge freezes it and forces them to try to make the marriage work for six months. You know, people who spontaneously wed in Vegas are lucky to last six days much less six months. If I had only one word to describe "What Happens in Vegas," that word would be "shrill." The comedy here is so broad and so over-the-top that it ultimately becomes more disturbing than funny. By the time Diaz and Kutcher were running through Central Park beating each other with loaves of bread, Iwas ready to cash in my chips. It doesn't help that the stars have the wrong kind of chemistry together. It's clear that Diaz and Kutcher really like each other and enjoyed working together, so I never bought them as bitter enemies. There are a few stray laughs along the way, and the actors are certainly energetic. But "What Happens in Vegas" got on my nerves with its bombastic humor and predictable conclusion. Like a real trip to Vegas, you go in full of hope and leave empty-handed. (2 stars)

Speed Racer
The Wachowski Brothers earned a significant level of coolness when they made "The Matrix" back in 1999, but they lost a lot of it with those two bloated, self-indulgent sequels. As far as I'm concerned, they earn a little bit of that coolness back with "Speed Racer," their adaptation of the popular cartoon series. Emile Hirsch plays the title character, a futuristic racecar driver. The only thing he loves more than racing is his family: pop John Goodman, mom Susan Sarandon, and girlfriend Christina Ricci. When Speed discovers that an evil corporation has been fixing races to maximize its own profits, he teams up with the enigmatic Racer X, played by Matthew Fox, to win the Grand Prix and bring the bad guys to their knees. "Speed Racer" is one of the most CGI-heavy movies I've ever seen. The special effects aren't just wall-to-wall; they're wall-to-wall and floor-to-ceiling. This over-reliance on visuals means that the film has a paper-thin plot and cardboard characters. Normally I'd criticize a movie for that, but in the case of "Speed Racer," it's all clearly an intentional part of the style. What I love is that they didn't even try to make this thing realistic. It really is like a cartoon come to life. The flick is endlessly amazing to look at, the racing scenes are seriously cool, and the actors figure out clever ways to play larger-than-life characters. "Speed Racer" is definitely aimed at kids, which may disappoint fans seeking a more hardcore experience. But I thought it was really fun and really different, and by the end I was cheering, "Go, Speed Racer, go!" (3 stars)

Iron Man
Ozzy Osbourne once said: "Heavy boots full of lead, fills his victims full of dread, running as fast as they can, iron man lives again." Of course, that was one of the few times in his life that you could actually understand what he was saying, but it's the perfect intro for the new movie "Iron Man." Robert Downey, Jr. plays Tony Stark, a billionaire industrialist whose company specializes in combat missiles. Stark is kidnapped by terrorists and forced to manufacture a weapon of mass destruction, which they plan to use against American troops. He escapes his captors by building a high-powered suit of armor and then goes after the bad guys in his new identity as Iron Man. (He also sues the Iron Chef for copyright infringement.) Helping him out are his personal assistant, played by Gwyneth Paltrow, and his military officer best friend, played by Terrence Howard. I've always felt that a superhero is only as good as his alter ego, and Robert Downey, Jr. was a brilliant choice to play the egotistical playboy-turned-costumed crime fighter. He makes us care about both Tony Stark and Iron Man. The movie's special effects and action scenes are first-rate. I also really liked the story, which has something smart to say about war profiteering. Most comic book movies are just escapist fun, but a select few are escapist fun with a little bit of substance. "Iron Man" falls into that category. The summer 2008 movie season has officially started off with a bang. (3 1/2 stars)

Baby Mama
"Baby Mama" stars Tina Fey as a career woman in her mid-30's whose biological clock is ticking louder than Big Ben. Because she's single and physically unable to have children, she resorts to hiring a surrogate, played by Amy Poehler. So basically, she pays someone else to experience hot flashes, hormone fluctuations, and morning sickness, while she keeps the baby. The surrogate is - how do I say this nicely? - a little rough around the edges, and when she moves in with Fey, the career woman suddenly discovers what it's like to be a parent. Let me start off by saying that I think Tina Fey and Amy Poehler are two of the funniest people on the planet. And because they worked together for so many years on "Saturday Night Live," they really understand each other's rhythms, which makes the comedy that much funnier. "Baby Mama" is very smart in the way it satirizes modern pregnancy issues, from fertility treatments to wellness routines to delivery options. There's also a great supporting performance from Steve Martin as Fey's hippy dippy boss. The plot of "Baby Mama" is kind of predictable, and you'll see where it's going long before it gets there. But otherwise, the comedy stork has delivered a real bundle of joy. (3 stars)